Lifestyles of the rich and famous

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In addition to being famous on my own merits (my published book Women’s Nonfiction: A Guide to Reading Interests is owned by 52 libraries, which amounts to $286 in royalties, an astronomical sum that places me squarely in the ranks of the rich and famous), it turns out I am famous by proxy. A couple of days ago in the library, a lady came up looking for books by David Sedaris.

This is not an uncommon question. He’s the funniest person alive. Of course people want his books. The thing is, this lady didn’t know he was the funniest person alive. She had found out that her kids’ friend Hugh was dating a guy who wrote books, so she thought she’d drop by the library to find out what this David Sedaris chappie had written.

Then later the same day I helped a gent look up books by Ben Bova. His age put him outside the typical range of the Science Fiction reader, so I prodded a little and asked what he liked about Bova’s books. Turns out he’d never read any, but he had discovered that his old work buddy Ben had published some stuff and he wanted to find out more.

Today at the library I didn’t enjoy any vicarious celebrity. Today at the library I didn’t enjoy anything, because I didn’t go to the library. Instead I stayed home and enjoyed the treacherous road conditions that prevented me from getting to work. I enjoyed them yesterday, too, along with a lovely long snow storm and about six inches of accumulation.

This is the sort of weather I’d like to experience frequently. I am not optimistic that the economy will improve before global warming makes snow go extinct, but just in case it happens in my lifetime that a job in a snowy mountainous climate becomes available, I would like it, please.

A job with a living wage, I should mention. I made the mistake of looking at nationwide library job openings the other day. It was depressing as hell. The only jobs out there are either directorships, for which I am so incredibly not qualified, or jobs with anemic salaries. $25,000 is not what I consider livable, even factoring in my fat royalty check.

Aside from the snow, I have nothing of moment to report. I have been spending my time solving logic problems and playing video games. (If anyone wants a detailed report on my character’s progress in the role-playing game I’m working on, I can bring you up to speed). I’ve had three fiction failures in the past few days, books that I gave up on after a few chapters, so I’m working instead on a Jon Krakauer nonfiction book. Though Mr. K. Writes about topics that I normally don’t follow (wildnerness survival and true crime and, in this case, a football-player-cum-military-man) I always enjoy his books. Of course it’s difficult to find time to read when you’re busy leveling up your character’s Light Armor rating (this involves killing lots of zombies in dungeons and so forth) but I do what I can.

Also, though I have whittled down my stack to a reasonable twenty-seven books checked out to me, it is conceivable that other library patrons may someday want to read these same books, so I suppose I had better get through them. Once my first royalty check arrives in Decemer I’ll be able to purchase my own damn library, but until then I need to be responsible and return my books on time. Also I need to kill zombies and play in the snow.


One response »

  1. "If anyone wants a detailed report on my character’s progress in the role-playing game I’m working on, I can bring you up to speed"YES!


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